


nothing i can see but you (when you dance, dance, dance)

by delorange



Category: Strictly Come Dancing RPF, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Abortion, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-22
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:41:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23253391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delorange/pseuds/delorange
Summary: dianne has a small problem (the size of a poppy seed, currently), and it’s joe’s.
Relationships: Dianne Buswell/Joe Sugg
Kudos: 9





	nothing i can see but you (when you dance, dance, dance)

**Author's Note:**

> hey! normally i’m not really the hugest fan of rpf, not going to lie... but these two are just too cute... hope i won’t go to hell for this😬😬😬 anyways enjoy! (if anyone actually reads this stuff on here, most i’ve seen of it’s on wattpad😬) 
> 
> ps. for context, joe and dianne had a little go at things whilst filming, but they broke it off completely after the final

It's a few weeks after the final that Dianne feels it. The sudden lurch of her stomach as she stands from her bed to make breakfast, which is then followed by a mad dash to the toilet before yesterday's dinner comes spewing back up. Disgusting, yes, but a cause for concern, no. 

Then it happens the next morning, and the one after that. Then her period's late, and then it doesn't show at all. She drags herself to a pharmacy and reluctantly buys a pregnancy test, and sobs for hours when it comes back positive. 

*

Her appointment for the abortion is scheduled for the next week, so she just has to sit tight until then. Joe is the only thing on her mind, as he has been since the night of the final. Before that too, if she's being honest with herself, but that night... she'd never forget it. Easily the best of her life. 

And now she was carrying his baby. There was no way it could possibly be anyone else's. She resolves not to tell anyone; it will be gone before there's any reason to. The thought of it getting out to the press kept her mouth firmly shut, as if she needed another reason. It would destroy her career on the show. You can't come back from a baby. 

Maybe it's the hormones, maybe it's the desperation, or maybe it's just a promise to do the right thing that takes her to Joe's door the night before her appointment. "Dianne!" He looks over the moon, and almost relieved, that she's appeared at his doorstep, albeit looking decidedly worse for wear. 

"I think you'd better sit down for this." He graciously lets her into his house and offers her a drink, which she politely declines. And then, she comes out with it. His face morphs into shock and confusion, but he doesn't look like he's about to speak, so Dianne continues. 

"I have an appointment in the morning. At the abortion clinic." Joe sucks in a breath, and for a moment, Dianne panics. He wants this baby, doesn't he, she thinks. He wants her to keep the baby and god knows she will, if that's what Joe wants. 

Then he shakes his head. "Okay, okay, I support that. If that's your choice, then I support you." And Dianne could sweep him into her arms and kiss him senseless for being so understanding. "I'll come with you. Moral support, if you haven't got Amy or anyone?"

She shakes her head. "Nobody knows." 

Joe worries his lip, staring down at his lap, then slowly nods his head, bringing his eyes to meet Dianne's. "And I assume you want to keep it that way?" Dianne nods guiltily. "Then it's settled. I'll come with you in the morning, and then there won't be anything to tell anyway. Easy to keep a nonexistent secret, isn't it?" 

He laughs, but it doesn't sound quite as full and genuine as the laugh Dianne had grown to love. Then he falls silent for another few moments. "Where is it?"

"Bloomsbury."

"Stay the night then. It'll be hours from yours with the morning traffic."

"Thank you." What she is thankful for remains up in the air, but the pair both know it's more than for just staying the night. Joe digs out some of Zoe's old pyjamas and they cuddle up on the couch for an episode or two of some random tv show on Channel 4, although neither are paying any attention whatsoever, wrapped up in their respective thoughts. 

They only manage until 10, then they settle down for the night, Joe in his bed and Dianne in the spare room. Later on, sleep just not taking her, Dianne creeps into Joe's room and slips under the covers, holding her breath. She releases it when he merely slings an arm around her, allowing her to nuzzle into his chest. 

*

"Morning, Di." Dianne wakes up in unfamiliar surroundings, but then Joe's there, and her racing heart slows. "It's 8, I didn't know what time your appointment is, but I didn't want you to miss it, so-"

Dianne can see him descending into ramblings, so she cuts him off. "Thanks, Joe, it's at 9, so... can we leave in half an hour?"

"Perfect." He looks at the door, but lingers for a second. "You're so brave, Dianne. Anything you need, today or later, just call, yeah?" She smiles softly. 

"Yeah." Joe nods, and leaves the room. Dianne spots clothes laid out, and she recognises them as the workout clothes that she lost ages ago. She tugs them on, relishing the familiarity of it all, and ignores the pull of her stomach when she forgoes breakfast. 

Then they're in the car, and Joe is staring at Dianne like she hung the sun. "What?"

"You're just... I'm so proud, you're so strong." He is still beaming, but Dianne is uncomfortable. 

She looks down at her lap. "Joe, if you want this baby..."

"No!" He says a little too quickly. "No. I want what's best for you, and if that's having this abortion, then that's what I want."

"If you want it, we can talk about this, I don't have to do this today." 

"If you're having second thoughts of your own account, Di, just say and we can go home."

She takes a deep breath. "No, I don't want it, I'm not ready."

"Come on then, we're here." They get out the car and Joe's hand instantly goes to Dianne's back, just like it always used to, in those months where they could pretend reality didn't exist, that life after Strictly didn't matter. 

She takes a deep breath and they push through the doors. "Dianne Buswell?" The woman hands her a form to fill out and they go and sit in a waiting area. There's a tiny TV on the wall playing a rerun of some quiz show that she takes very little interest in, but some women seem very invested in. It is a good way to take your mind off things, she supposes. 

"This bit's for you." She hands the form to Joe when she gets to the person picking the patient up. He fills it out and returns it to the desk. They sit in silence until her name is called. Joe presses a tender kiss to her temple as she stands and follows a nurse. 

*

She returns several hours later, nausea swirling in her tummy even now. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay." Joe can tell it's the biggest overstatement ever, and hurries her into the car. 

"You want to stop at a shop on the way home?" She shakes her head, and the silence settles over them once again as they drive back to Joe’s. Dianne goes to bed as soon as they get back, arms clutched around her midsection, and just as she drops off, she hears Joe on the phone, but she can’t make the words out as she is lost to sleep once again. 

*

It’s late afternoon when Dianne wakes up, and she is instantly hit with the nausea again. Joe’s there by the toilet, holding her hair back and rubbing soothing circles on her skin until she’s finished. He sets about making her some food and she curls up on the couch. 

A thought occurs to Dianne. “Did you not have to work today?”

Joe shrugs, putting the knife in his hand down. “I did, I cancelled it all. I should be here, with you.”

“You didn’t have to do that. You didn’t have to do any of this.”

“I know.” He smiles, and takes the finished product across to Dianne. It’s a salad with all the trimmings, just how she likes. She instinctively reaches up to kiss him on the cheek, but she catches herself. 

“I- sorry, I-“

Joe sighs, and Dianne’s heart sinks. She knows what’s coming. “I think we need to talk about this, Di...” She nods in agreement, and he sits down next to her. Neither of them speak for a bit, and the salad on Dianne’s knee remains untouched, until she takes the fist step. 

“I think about you all the time.” It’s not exactly a declaration of love, but by the way Joe visibly exhales, relief flooding his features, you wouldn’t think any different. 

“Same. I think we made the wrong decision.” He says it confidently, but the confidence drops at the expression on Dianne’s face. 

She’s worried, and thinking back to the reasons they didn’t carry their little relationship on past Strictly in the first place. “But what about everyone else, our families, the media?”

Joe grabs her hands, his voice full of hope. “I know, I know, but... I’m willing to give it a go if you are.”

A smile breaks onto Dianne’s lips for the foray time that day, and she nods. “... I think I’d like that.”

“You think?” Joe teases. 

“Shut up.” They laugh, and Joe pulls her into his side.


End file.
